Quit Your Job, Sis

BEST OF EP 3: Your Career Is Like Your Relationship (Are You Settling?)

April 24, 2023 Lindsay Hanson Episode 168
Quit Your Job, Sis
BEST OF EP 3: Your Career Is Like Your Relationship (Are You Settling?)
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

If you knew that you could succeed in whatever job you want, would you stay in the one you're in now?

If another job offered more money or better benefits, would you go after those opportunities, or do you feel like you’re doing what you’re meant to be doing? 

If you answered ‘no’ to any of the above questions, you are settling in your career. 

“Okay… so what? Who isn’t? Everyone hates their job!”

You’d never let your best friend settle for a relationship that wasn’t right for her, so why are you allowing yourself to do the same thing with your career?

Maybe you’ve never thought about it before. Maybe you think it's normal to hate your job, that that’s what being an adult is - working 40+ hours a week, waiting for the weekend.  

I have some news: that’s NOT normal. Hating your job is not normal, and just because everyone around you hates their job doesn’t mean you have to hate yours too.

In this eye-opening episode, I discuss:

  • What it means to settle in your career 
  • How to know if you are settling
  • How to identify why you’re settling
  • How to stop settling and actually go after what you want

It’s time to stop living your life on autopilot.

If you’re ready to live an extraordinary life instead of a mediocre one, this episode is one you can’t miss!


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[00:00:00] Lindsay: If you knew that you could succeed in whatever job you want, would you stay in the one you're in now? If the answer is no. Then you are settling.

[00:00:24] How many times have you thought about quitting your job and starting a new life? Hey, I'm Lindsay, the girl who actually did that. And now I'm on a mission to change the nine-to-five narrative that dreading Monday and working for the weekend is normal and acceptable. My goal is to help you see your potential beyond your credentials, gain clarity on what it means to live life on your own terms and build the confidence to go after your dream career.

[00:00:52] I'm here to prove to you that it's possible for you to do work you love, make a positive impact on the world, make even more money than you're making right now, and live a deeply fulfilling life. So let's dive in.

[00:01:15] Hello, my friends. Welcome to the first full-length episode of Quit Your Job, Sis. I created this podcast because I want to encourage you to stop settling in your career, go to a job you hate every day, and go after what you really want. To go after your dream career, your dream, to leave good for great, because I know you can do that. And so, for the first episode, I want to dive into what it means to settle in your career. How do you know if you are settling? Why is it that you're settling, and how do you stop settling and actually go after what you really want in your life and career?

[00:02:10] To start, I want to define: what is settling, right? And to me, settling is when you accept good or mediocre instead of going after greatness and what you really want. And this can apply to any area of your life. I am specifically going to be focusing on your career, but this applies to your relationships and your living situation. Are you really living where you want to be living? Like any aspect of your life, this can be applied. But today, we're going to focus on your career. And it really, really boils down to just one simple question. And the answer to this question will tell you whether or not you're settling in your career.

[00:03:02] Okay? So if you knew that you could succeed in whatever job you want, would you stay in the one you're in now? Are you in the career that would be your number one choice? Always. No matter what you're like, I don't care. If there was another job that offered me way more money and benefits, I'm doing what I'm meant to be doing, and this would be my choice any day of the week.

[00:03:34] If the answer is no, then you are settling. And you might be thinking, "Hold up, hold up, Lindsay. Hold up, girlfriend. Because 90% of the people I know hate their job. That's just part of adulting; you go to work to make money and support yourself to live the lifestyle you want outside of work.

[00:03:55] You don't necessarily need to be doing work that's like your freaking life's work, like what you're meant to be doing. You get up every morning, and you're so freaking excited to go to work; that's not normal. That's just not reality, right? Like 90% of people hate their job, and that's normal.

[00:04:12] And what I want to say to that is, yes, you are absolutely right. That is normal for 90% of people, and that's because 90% of people are settling. Just because this is normal does not mean that it should be, Sis, and you don't have to settle just because everybody around you is also doing that, so it feels normal to you. If you know you're made for more, you need to go after that. And the best way to really put this in perspective is to think of your career as you would think of your relationship. Because in relationships, we can clearly identify when someone is settling in a relationship, and we never think that's okay. Still, when it comes to your career, we think that settling in your career is normal, acceptable, and fine. 

[00:05:02] So imagine you are talking to one of your friends, and you ask her how her relationship is. She's, you know, been dating this guy for like six months, and you're like, cool, how's Kyle? How's he doing, girlfriend? Tell me everything. And your best friend looks at you, and she's like, "Oh, you know, it's not too bad.

[00:05:22] Like, our relationship is all right. It's tough most of the time, but it has its benefits, you know, and I'm happy for the most part. Like, I'm happy, you know, more than I'm unhappy, and it's tolerable. Um, so yeah. You know, it's like, it's good overall." Imagine if your friend said that to you about her relationship.

[00:05:42] You would be like, hold the fucking phone, sis. This shit is not okay. What are you talking about? Your relationship isn't that bad, and it's tolerable, and it's all right, and you're happy most of the time. What about the rest of the time when you're not happy? How is that acceptable? Girl, you have to get out of this relationship.

[00:06:01] What are you doing? And, Sis, rewind this. Listen to everything I just said, and tell me that those are not the same things that you say when someone asks you how you like your job. Because when you go up to your best friend and ask her about her relationship, you expect her to say, oh my God, it's amazing.

[00:06:21] I am so in love; I want to be with this person for the rest of my life. I couldn't be happier. But for some reason, we don't expect people to say that about their careers. And for some reason, you think it's acceptable for you not to feel that way about your career. Think about it if your friend said to you, if you ask her, girl, why are you still in this relationship if you're feeling this way?

[00:06:43] Imagine if she said, well, there's probably no one better out there. You would be like, what are you talking about? Of course, there is. Are you insane? There is someone out there who is going to give you everything that you want. And that brings me to why? Why are you settling? Because the biggest reason why you're settling in your career is that you don't believe there's something better out there.

[00:07:09] You don't believe that your dream career would give you everything you want; that would make you excited to wake up in the morning and give you the flexibility to live your life how you truly want to be living it. You don't believe that exists. And so you're settling for this career that you don't feel passionate about, and you're working 10 to 12-hour days doing work that you don't even care about, and you have zero work-life balance, and you're accepting that because you don't think there's something better out there.

[00:07:41] And because you think the benefits of the money and whatever other perks you're getting somehow outweigh the fact that you are not happy and fulfilled by your career. And that's the number one reason why you're settling. And the second reason you're settling is that you don't believe you are in control of your outcomes and success, right? If you've ever thought about changing careers or just daydreamed about doing something else, then you're like, what if I fail? Or I don't know how to do that. I don’t know if I'd be successful at that. Then you don't believe that you're in control of your success. But your success is up to you, sis.

[00:08:19] Are you going to go out there and learn whatever you need to learn, get whatever skills you need to get, and do whatever you need to do to be successful at that career because that's all within your control? But if you don't believe that, then, of course, you're not going to go after that career. So even if you believe that your dream career is out there, you don't believe that you can get it, or you don't believe that you would be successful at it, and that's what's keeping you stuck in this mediocre, mundane job that you hate.

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[00:09:53] If you're ready to feel more energized, focused, and supported, go to lairdsuperfood.com/QYJS and add nourishing plant-based foods to fuel you from sunrise to sunset. That's L A I R D superfood.com/QYJS, and use the promo code Q Y J S at checkout to save 15% off your purchase today.

[00:10:19] And the third reason, which I think is a huge one, especially for women, whether we're talking about your career or especially your relationships like I am not a relationship coach, but I have a lot of opinions about settling in your relationship. Okay? So DM me if you ever need some help with that. All right, sis, like, I'm here for you.

[00:10:49] But the third major reason you are settling is what I like to call 'good enough thinking.' You're like; I have this amazing job. I mean, I was like, I am working at one of the big four accounting firms; people would literally kill for this job. I have such good benefits; I'm making good money.

[00:11:10] Like I should just be grateful for what I have and not complain about it and not wanna change it. Because we think that wanting to change something in our lives means we're not grateful for what we have, which is not true. You can be absolutely 100% grateful for everything you have and still want to change it.

[00:11:31] You can be in a good relationship and still want to leave it to find something great that doesn't make you ungrateful. And good enough thinking is such a trap because it gets masked as gratitude, but, Sis, leaving good for great does not make you ungrateful. It does not make you a bad person. It does not mean that you don't appreciate what you have. It just means that you know you were made for more, and you know there's something better out there, and you are going to go after it, and you're going to find it, and you're going to fight for it, and you're going to work for it because you are not willing to settle. And really, that's the main reason anyone settles because it is more comfortable for you to stay where you're at than to jump into the unknown to see what else is out there.

[00:12:23] Because even if you're going to a job you hate every day, even if you're in a relationship, that's just okay, and you're constantly dreaming of something more and wishing for something more and wondering if something more is out there, that's your comfort zone. Your comfort zone is going to this job that you hate every day, and even if you hate it, it's what is known to you.

[00:12:45] It's what you know; it's what you're comfortable with. And so going after something else that is unknown is always going to be uncomfortable, and it's always going to be the harder choice. And that's why so many people just settle into this career, settle into this mediocre life, and never go after greatness.

[00:13:04] They never try to see what else is out there for them, even though they know they're made for more, deep down inside. Because it is so much easier just to sit back and relax and kick your feet up, grab a drink, and just watch your life pass you by. It's easier for you to be passive in your own life than to actively try to change your situation and strive for more and better because that requires you to put in the work every day.

[00:13:31] Right now, you can just sit on cruise control, go through the motions of your life, go to this job that you hate every day, and literally watch your life pass you by; to not have to go through change, not have to go through discomfort, not have to put in any of the work that it takes to see what you're truly made of and what is truly possible for you.

[00:13:54] And that is entirely your choice, girlfriend. If you want to sit back and watch your life pass you by, go for it. I'm still here for you, but this podcast is probably not for you. But if you are not willing to settle and you know that you're made for more, and you are ready to find out what else is out there for you and build a life that you're freaking proud of and do work that you're excited to wake up and do every day.

[00:14:20] And have a freaking amazing relationship instead of just an okay one. If you're ready to live an extraordinary life instead of a mediocre one, then this podcast is for you. Let's talk about how to stop settling. And this process on paper looks really simple. In practice, getting yourself in the right mindset to do all these things is much harder.

[00:14:48] But here's what this looks like on paper. How to stop settling and start living your absolute dream life, have your dream career, have your dream relationship, whatever you want to apply this to, right? First, you just have to decide what your dream life looks like. What does your dream career look like?

[00:15:09] You have to decide on the purpose and what you actually want your life to look like instead of just sitting back and being reactive to whatever happens to you and living your life passively. Okay? And this is what most people don't do: choose on purpose what you want your life to look like.

[00:15:28] Do you even want to go to a nine-to-five job every day, or do you want to work for yourself? Do you want to start your own business? Do you want to have that freedom to work from home, not have to answer to anyone, to set your own schedule? Or do you like the structure and accountability of going to your nine-to-five job?

[00:15:46] That's up to you, right? What type of work do you want to be doing? Do you want to sit at a desk pushing numbers around Excel all day? Or do you want to be doing something that actually makes an impact on other people's lives? Do you want to be doing something that feels more meaningful? Do you even know what that is?

[00:16:05] If you don't, that's step one, sis. You have to figure out what it is that you actually want to be doing. And that is what I focus on as a life coach. So if you are stuck right now in that place of, like, I hate my job. I know this career is not what I want, and I feel like I'm settling, and I know I'm made for more, but I just don't know what my dream life and what my dream career actually looks like, then, girlfriend, I’m here for you.

[00:16:32] Send me a DM on LinkedIn, Instagram, or wherever we are connected. If we're not connected, find me @lindsaymhanson and send me a dm because that's step one. And we need to get that step right for you to stop settling and really step into the life that you're meant to be living. Okay? But that's step one. What do you want your life to look like? 

[00:16:58] And then from there, what needs to happen in order for that to be my life? What steps do you need to take to make this happen? To make this your reality, right? Do you need to quit your job? Do you need to start applying for other jobs?

[00:17:14] Do you need to hire a business coach? Do you need to move across the country? Do you need to end the relationship that you're in? Yikes. That might be a tough one to swallow, sis. You can't live an extraordinary life with a mediocre relationship, girlfriend. It won't work. So what are the steps you need to take to make this happen?

[00:17:35] And then what is your brain telling you about why you can't do those things? What thoughts, beliefs, and fears come up when you think about quitting your job? When you think about making that move and ending that relationship, what comes up for you? Is your brain telling you, "Well, you can't do that because you have a degree in accounting and can't just move into this other field?

[00:17:59] You can't do that because you'd have to go back to school, and you don't have time to do that, and you already have 50 K in student loans and you can't take on any more debt. What if you fail? What if you know your parents don't support you? What are your parents going to think? What are your friends going to think?"

[00:18:15] If you want to start a business, you have no idea how even to start a business, and you're like, I don't know how to do that, right? Whatever it is, whatever your brain is telling you about why you can't do those things or why those things are scary, write all that down because those are all the thoughts that you need to work through in order to stop settling and be lucky for you those are all the thoughts that we are going to address throughout this podcast, so make sure that you are subscribed, that you will get the episodes every single week when they come out because my goal with this podcast is to give you the tools you need to live an extraordinary life instead of settling for mediocre.

[00:18:57] So go ahead and hit subscribe wherever you're listening to this. Take a screenshot, put it on your Instagram story, and tag me @lindsaymhanson. I would love to see that you're listening, and the biggest thing you can do to support this podcast, support this mission, and get other people involved and help me in my mission to change people's lives is to hop onto iTunes and leave a review. I would appreciate you doing that if you love this podcast and are excited about the rest of the episodes. I will absolutely read every single one. Shout you guys. I just love seeing that you're listening and hearing your thoughts on the podcast, and that would mean so much to me.

[00:19:39] And another thing that you can do is share this, share it with a friend, with a coworker, with whoever needs to hear this. Okay? Share this with your BFF, who's dating Kyle, and you know it's time for them to break up. I'm here for her too. I won't be talking about relationships for the most part.

[00:19:59] You never know where we might end up, but for now, we're focusing on settling in your career and how to stop settling so you can live an extraordinary life. I can't wait to talk to you guys next week.

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Lindsay talks about Laird Superfood, an all-natural, plant-based brand to help fuel your routine. Use this promo code to try it for yourself!
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